HARRY CHAPIN WAS NO DEADBEAT DAD

(Cats in the Cradle lyrics explained)

 

I am getting sick and tired of hearing what a deadbeat Dad Harry Chapin was. Critics are always saying that Chapin never had time for his son as he was always off catching planes or paying bills. But if one examines the lyrics to Cats in the Cradle carefully, any sensible person will conclude that Chapin was a remarkable father who raised a very caring and well-mannered boy.
 

Let's start with the first arrow slung at Chapin….that he wasn't even around when his son, Josh, learned to walk. Well, the date a child walks for the first time is not exactly set in stone. When Josh starting walking with assistance, how the hell was Harry supposed to know when he would finally do it on his own? Mr. Chapin was a s-i-n-g-e-r; he couldn't afford to just sit at home all day watching Josh wobble around. Let's now go forward to when Josh turned 10. From the song it appears that Josh wanted to play ball with his old man but Harry just had too much to do. What father can simply drop everything and play ball with his 10 year old every time he asks? Josh was born on November 15th, so that means it was only a week or so before Thanksgiving. What father has the time to throw a ball during this very hectic time of hoarding food and raking leaves?

Also, it's critical to note that after Chapin refused to play ball with Josh, Josh walked away with a smile on his face and said he wanted to be like him. You would expect a son who was not happy with his father to say something like "you never have time for me…you're always too busy catching your planes and paying your bills!" But no, Josh paid his Dad the ultimate compliment by saying he wanted to be just like him. So my guess is that Chapin played a LOT of ball with his son, and was simply preoccupied with something else on this particular occasion, such as the aforementioned raking leaves.

You might be wondering why I haven't addressed the chorus of the song. Frankly, I'm not sure what cats in cradles, silver spoons and little boy blues on the moon have to do with the song. Sounds like Harry may have been tripping on drugs when he wrote these lyrics, so I'd rather not go there at this time.

Let's forward now to when Josh is in college and ask for the car keys. Note when Harry asks Josh to sit for awhile Harry shook his head with a smile. Once again, you wouldn't expect a son unhappy in his relationship with his father to be smiling all the time while in his presence. And note the excellent manners that Josh displays here when asking for the keys...he says "see you later, can I have them, please?" If Josh didn't have such a good relationship with his father, you would expect him to say, "See you later, now give'um to me!"

Finally, after Chapin has long since retired and has son has moved away, note how pleasant their conversation is. Many argue that Josh was getting back at his Dad and giving him a taste of his own medicine. I beg to differ. I say Josh's new job probably really was a hassle, as new jobs often are. Also, do you think Josh would actually lie to his father in saying that Harry's grandkids have the flu when they really didn't? To needlessly worry his father over the health of the grandchildren would be positively sadistic.

Finally, note that before hanging up the phone, Josh says "It was sure nice talking to you, Dad." It must have been extremely important for Josh to communicate these words to his Dad, as he goes ahead and repeats them almost immediately…"it was sure nice talking to you". We really don't know why he repeated those words…naysayers might argue that there have been static on the line and that Harry may have had trouble hearing him the first time, as this was over 30 years ago and long distance phone connections weren't what they are today.

I disagree. I think this was Josh's way of communicating to his father that while he couldn't see him at that particular time due to his new job and the kids having the flu, he treasured the opportunity of even talking to him. Does this sound like a boy who has been neglected by his Dad while growing up in the Chapin household? If you still think so, then you were probably neglected yourself and simply take some sort of perverse pleasure in hearing how other kids were neglected, too. If that is the case I'm afraid you'll have to look elsewhere, as the lyrics of Cats in the Cradle prove that Mr. Harry Chapin was an awesome Dad who raised a terrific boy.